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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24395809">Of Good and Bad Presents</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CappuccettoRosso/pseuds/CappuccettoRosso'>CappuccettoRosso</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Shiritori Challenge 2020 [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Gen, Pre-Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:34:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,288</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24395809</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CappuccettoRosso/pseuds/CappuccettoRosso</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>As far as he is concerned, only the best for his love. (Or Kakashi is the type to go big or go home, much to Iruka's dismay).</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Shiritori Challenge 2020 [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1714708</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>125</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Iruka's Birthday Shiritori 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Good and Bad Presents</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">

        <li>
          Translation into Русский available: 
            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27876894">О хороших и плохих подарках</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Berry_tea_with_cookies/pseuds/Berry_tea_with_cookies">Berry_tea_with_cookies</a>
        </li>

        <li>
            Inspired by

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24147268">What more could he ever want</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/myka1231/pseuds/myka1231">myka1231</a>.
        </li>

    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Happy Birthday, Iruka-sensei! This is my final entry for the Shiritori Challenge.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>"You never can tell whether bad luck may not after all turn out to be good luck" -- Winston Churchill</p>
</blockquote><p> </p><p>
  <em>…want…</em>
</p><p>His fingers tremble as they feather down the spine of a book. One of many he was itching to grab and read. The book's cover looks old and power practically drips off of it. He looks down the row of books and a giddiness swirls in his chest.</p><p>
  <em>…I want….</em>
</p><p>A glint catches his attention and he turns his head. There is a chest sitting on the floor, up against the back wall of the room. The chest's lid is open and he can clearly see the gold coins, precious jewels, and all manner treasures held within. One particularly fat ruby quickly ensnares his gaze.</p><p>
  <em>…I want it all…!</em>
</p><p>The words echo in Iruka's mind. His tails wave energetically in the air. His eyes flicker around, trying to take every inch of the room. His poor kitsune heart! This was a dream come true.</p><p>Next to Iruka, Kakashi is having his own crisis. Iruka looks too cute, unconsciously making a happy sound that sounds like a bark mixed with a yip. He is so tempted to grab Iruka and kiss him. He turns away from the adorable sight and looks around. There is dusty, old crap scattered around. Kakashi doesn't see the appeal, personally, but this was a date. It wasn't about pleasing him, but ensuring his significant other was enjoying himself. He eyes one of the swords hanging on the wall, thinking that he could probably pawn it and buy something nice for Iruka.</p><p>"Ugh, is he drooling…? What is wrong with him?"</p><p>Kakashi glances at the little boy standing next to him. The room is poorly lit but the kid's blonde hair practically glows. His chubby face is twisted into a scowl. It makes him look funny rather than threatening. Kakashi ruffles his hair roughly, making the boy cry out and take a swipe at him with his baby claws.</p><p>"What? He's happy." Kakashi says. He doesn't bother dodging when the boy catches his hand and bites it. He smiles and lifts his hand, making the boy hanging in the air by his teeth. "As a fellow kitsune, Naruto, you should be able to recognize joy."</p><p>Naruto glares at him and says something. The words are muffled since he is still biting Kakashi's hand. Naruto's single tail flicks angrily in the air.</p><p>Kakashi laughs and looks back over to Iruka, only to find him gone. Kakashi blinks and then hears from behind him a voice say:</p><p>"What are you two doing here?"</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The Uchiha were ridiculous.</p><p>Not ridiculous in the way the Hatake clan was ridiculous with their big brains and raw power. The Uchiha have geniuses in the family, too, and they were definitely no pushovers when it came to magical ability. They were, however, merely above average when compared to someone of the Hatake bloodline.</p><p>Everyone was if truth be told. When compared to those nerds, most of the population was stupid.</p><p>They were also not ridiculous in the way the Umino were ridiculous, with their ability to get into everything like glitter or sand, just everywhere. For one, the Uchiha were a proud clan, with a long family history of serving the supernatural community. The family held a prominent role. They were the ones responsible for enforcing the law, protecting the innocent, and keeping the peace. Their family held lawyers, royal guards, judges, police officers, and the occasional bounty hunters. Still their influence was bound by the law, and their actions were guided by their strict moral code, making them unwilling to use underhanded tactics, unlike those shameless Umino.</p><p>No, the Uchiha were ridiculous because they were honest to goodness cursed. Cursed in such a stupid way that it made most people ask themselves what was wrong with the world.</p><p>To put the curse into perspective, we turn to Uchiha Daisuke. Several hundred years ago, Daisuke went into town to sell oil-paper umbrellas. He had a talent for it and made a small profit off of this. That day, unfortunately, Daisuke was attacked. Not only was his money taken, but he was also stripped naked and left unconscious between two buildings. To make matters worse, when he woke up, he was seen by someone, who immediately called the local guards, mistaking Daisuke for a pervert. Daisuke was confused and panicked. He tried to run away by running across the rooftops, which caught the attention of everyone, including the guards chasing him.</p><p>Daisuke did not go far. When he jumped onto a particular roof, the wood gave way under his weight. The guards saw this and immediately stormed the small house. Inside, they found a naked Daisuke, laying on top of a group of men, and a small boy bound and muzzled. The men turned out to be thieves and the boy the son of a local daimyo who the thieves had kidnapped for ransom.</p><p>Word spread and the daimyo gave Daisuke both land and money as a reward for rescuing his son. Now, it wouldn't be too bad, all things considered, if not for the fact that paintings and a play were done in order to commemorate Daisuke's streaking.</p><p>This, of course, wouldn't be the last time the Uchiha's shame was caught and immortalized.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>There was a kid standing just behind them. The kid has black hair and eyes, typical of the Uchiha. He was scowling, feet braced as if readying for an attack.</p><p>Kakashi darts a quick look around but can't find Iruka. A quick scan using his power tells Kakashi everything.</p><p>Iruka was no longer in the room, or in the compound. The little shit actually left.</p><p><em>My husband has abandoned me</em>, Kakashi thinks, feeling both proud at Iruka's escaping prowess and disbelief that his love would jump ship like that.</p><p>"Yo!" Kakashi says. He feels Naruto let go. The boy drops down and stares at the Uchiha with a scowl of his own. "What's your name?"</p><p>The kid glares and takes a menacing step forward. "You are not supposed to be here. This is Uchiha land."</p><p>"What's wrong with your hands?" Naruto asks. He points at the other boy's hands. Naruto then barks a laugh. "Are those Chinese finger traps?!"</p><p>Kakashi looks at the boy's hands and snorts. The boy has five Chinese finger traps bounding all ten of his fingers. How or why the kid has them, Kakashi can't even begin to guess. It looks ridiculous.</p><p>The Uchiha boy blushes, the color spreading down his neck. "Ah…well… you see…just, just shut up!"</p><p>Naruto is laughing, clutching at his stomach. "Are you stupid? How can you get all ten of your fingers trapped?"</p><p>"It was an accident!"</p><p>"One is an accident. Five just means you're a retard!"</p><p>"You're the idiot! You're the one that broke into my house and got caught!" the boy snaps.</p><p>Naruto crosses his arms and gives the other boy a superior look. "Yeah, and it was so easy. Your defenses suck."</p><p>Kakashi rolls his eyes. The defenses were not that easy to get through. Uzumaki Kushina was just that good. He reaches into his pocket and grabs the item Kushina gave them. Well, the date was over. It was time to go.</p><p>"Alright, boys, this playdate is over," Kakashi says with a cheery tone. He grabs the back of Naruto's jacket and waves at the Uchiha boy. "Goodbye, Uchiha-kun. Send my love to your cousin, and stay away from finger traps, okay?"</p><p>Kakashi doesn't wait for a response and disappears with a snap of magic.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Not much was known about the curse, even less on how to break it.</p><p>There were a lot of speculations, but the facts were few. They knew that the curse changed their luck. Without prompt or warning, good luck could turn into bad luck; and bad luck into good luck. It doesn't happen all the time, but its effects were long-lasting. So while the curse was active sporadically, its consequences were felt even days, or weeks after, like aftershocks of an earthquake. Because of this, the members of the Uchiha clan were taught to expect the unexpected and to roll with the sudden changes to the best of their ability.</p><p>They also knew that the curse started with the arrival of a simple <em>uchiwa</em>.</p><p>The <em>uchiwa</em> was a gift given to their founding father. Who gave them the gift or the reason why it would be cursed, to begin with, are things that have been lost to time. The <em>uchiwa</em> itself is simple enough. Made of ordinary materials, with red lacquer, there is nothing out of the ordinary. The fan was still intact, despite its age. It is kept in the vault, along with the rest of the family heirlooms.</p><p>It took years for them to realize that the source of the curse came from the uchiwa. Afterward, many experts and a slew of priests and other holy people have examined the fan, in the hopes of breaking the curse. Chants and seals are unable to dampen its effects. Attempts to physically destroy the fan have all failed. They have even tried to throw the <em>uchiwa</em> into Mount Fuji, only for it to appear the next day back in the family vault.</p><p>Nothing has worked, and at this point, no one in the Uchiha family believes that they will be able to be free of it.</p><p>Of course, who would have known that all they needed to do to get rid of the fan was to invite a fox into their home?</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>"Do you have a search warrant?"</p><p>The young man in front of him blinks slowly. "My car broke down. I just want to make a phone call."</p><p>Iruka eyes him with distrust. "Oh, yeah? Then prove it."</p><p>The young man stares and doesn't say anything. The little boy next to him hisses like a cat. "Why would we lie?"</p><p>"Saa, Iruka-kun, I think they are telling the truth," Kakashi says.</p><p>Iruka shots him an annoyed look. "They are Uchiha. You can't trust them."</p><p>The young man snorts. "Look, Sasuke, a Umino talking about trust."</p><p>Iruka opens his mouth to retort when his mother suddenly appears behind him, with Naruto in her arms. "Iruka-kun, what are you doing? Invite the guests inside." She then looks at the guests and her happy expression vanishes. In her arms, Naruto gasps and points furiously at Sasuke.</p><p>"Okaasan, that's the dumbass that got stuck in a Chinese finger trap!"</p><p>Sasuke's face is bright red. "I should have known you would be here in this…this…den of thieves!"</p><p>"You wanna fight!" Naruto shouts.</p><p>"Yeah!"</p><p>Kohari clears her throat delicately and keeps a tight hold on Naruto, who looks half-feral. Sasuke isn't far behind, with his eyes flashing red.</p><p>She stares at the young man and says. "Do you have a search warrant, Itachi-kun?"</p><p>Uchiha Itachi pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes. "I'm not an actual police officer, Umino-san. I just want to make a phone call. My car broke down and I need a lift."</p><p>"Oh, really?" She stares at him for a long moment. "Okay, then, just one moment." She turns around and shouts to the people inside. "Oi! We have an Uchiha at the door!" There is a moment of silence and then they hear shouts and the sound of people running from further inside the home. After several minutes of this, she turns back to them with a smile. She shoves Iruka toward Kakashi and gestures for Itachi to come in. "So Itachi-kun, I heard that you're getting married. Are you excited?"</p><p>"How did you…? That happened <em>yesterday</em>."</p><p>She laughs and yanks Itachi further inside, leaving Kakashi, Iruka, and Sasuke standing in the doorway. Iruka looks at the little boy. "Well, don't you have a fight to get to?"</p><p>Sasuke huff at him and bolts. Iruka shoots Kakashi a narrow-eyed look.</p><p>"Did you tell them?"</p><p>"That you stole their spooky fan? Of course not!"</p><p>Iruka hums and then asks: "So what are you doing here?"</p><p>Kakashi gives him a mock offended look. "What? Do you think I would miss my future husband's birthday?"</p><p>Iruka sighs. He doesn't even protest the name anymore. "How did you know it was even my birthday?"</p><p>Kakashi winks at him. "It's a secret."</p><p>"My mom told you, didn't she?"</p><p>"Mother-in-law is the best," Kakashi says. He then shoves something heavy into Iruka's arms. "Here, I brought you a little gift."</p><p>Iruka looks down and sees that it is a stone statue in the shape of a weird looking creature. It sort of looks like a cat, but with two tails. "What is this?"</p><p>"Oh, just a little something I made for you," Kakashi says, lightly. "After you ditched me on our date…"</p><p>"It wasn't a date."</p><p>"I went back and looked around again and got inspired." Kakashi smiles. "I hope you like it."</p><p>Iruka examines the statute. The creature is sort of creepy and he can feel a vaguely dangerous aura coming from it. There are all sorts of symbols carved on it and some of them Iruka recognizes as powerful seals. Something about them nags at the back of his mind. "Okay, but why a cat?"</p><p>Kakashi shrugs. "Don't know. You should ask Matatabi-<em>sama</em>."</p><p>Iruka feels like an alarm went off in his head at the name. "Matatabi-<em>sama</em>…" he repeats and then he gasps sharply. His whole body feels like it's shaking. He wants to throw the statue away but he's too afraid that it might break. He glares at Kakashi instead.</p><p>"Kakashi, you did not just give me a <em>bijuu</em>!</p><p>Kakashi smiles and says: "Happy Birthday!"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am more than likely not going to add stories to this universe right now. It was only because of the challenge that I was able to even find the inspiration to write these. Outside of it, though, I don't believe I will continue. However, if that were to change, then I am more than willing to add to this universe. Still, don't hold your breath. Thanks for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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